Written by: Ms. Nicola Kay
Science teacher (Head of Science, Maths & Computing)
‘I build relationships with students based on mutual respect’. This is a line taken from my personal statement when I applied for my first teaching post. It wasn’t a lie but more of a misguided, throwaway phase.
Nearly 14 years later, I actually understand what it means to build relationships with students and the importance that it plays in guiding them through both the academic and social aspects of school and into life as an adult.
Knowing my students helps me to plan, not just a lesson, but rather a learning experience and the creation of a space that safeguards their mental and physical health whilst I am in loco parentis. A good teacher will know: your child’s grades on standardised tests, their reading age, their strengths and weaknesses and their academic goals, but a great teacher will know so much more!
At the heart of every meaningful student-teacher relationship lies trust. Trust is the cornerstone upon which communication, collaboration, and growth flourish. When students feel secure in their relationship with their teacher, they are more likely to engage actively in the learning process. Trust creates a safe space where students feel comfortable expressing their doubts, sharing their opinions and taking risks in their academic pursuits.
That trust is fostered when a teacher takes the time to learn what ‘school’ means to them. Is it a road to a well thought out goal, or just a means to an end? Is it a home away from home, is it a miserable enforced way to pass their childhood? This single piece of information means that you have listened, and ultimately, acknowledgement and validation of their opinion and experiences is the foundation of meaningful connections.
I would hope that all teachers, in any phase of education, will be able to motivate their students while in class but for that motivation to remain when not at school is a different challenge. A great teacher will help their students learn how to find their own motivation. Helping them to identify themselves as a reader, a writer, a person with something valuable to say and something worthwhile to contribute. The teacher will know which challenges they respond most powerfully to and how to set and pursue their goals and create their own metrics for success.
It is often said that teachers wear many hats – Councillor, Nurse, Data Analyst, Mediator, to name a few – but Designer is one we often forget about. Great teachers don’t just deliver a lesson. They have designed that lesson for the multitude of personalities, learning styles and circumstances that sit in front of them; they know that Child A will thrive in a competition but Child B will crumble, that Child B needs to have some quiet processing time and that their doodling of seemingly pointless flowers and hearts is actually their way of channelling their focus. We can only know this if we have an awareness of the person and not just the student.
It is apparent that the student-teacher relationship is important beyond academic achievement but clearly a relationship cannot be only one way. What is the benefit of teachers opening up and allowing students to get to know them? My thoughts are that the implications of teachers being humanised are significant. Within the limits of appropriateness, and a consideration of the age and maturity level of the students, as well as cultural norms and school policies, a teacher sharing details of their life outside the classroom enhances the sense of trust and community. It allows teachers to model vulnerability, openness and resilience. A teacher who is enthused about their passions or hobbies will spark curiosity and participation in their classroom. I don’t believe that sharing anecdotes about my holiday makes me a better teacher but it does go some way to nurturing that mutual respect that I claimed to possess when training in my profession.
My philosophy is mirrored by my colleagues at ISPH. The experience and dedication of the staff represent the care and nurture you could only hope is shared across all schools, and I assure you that your child is recognised as an individual and not just another cog in the wheel.
So for the new or aspiring teachers, go beyond the data, the tests, the obvious, and be open to knowing and being known by your students. Parents, know that there are many great teachers who really know your child and are making huge contributions to their self esteem, emotional intelligence and, of course, their report grades. To the students, your teachers don’t have a bed under their desk, they have goals and aspirations, they laugh and they cry, just like you!
